Many people think that they “know” me, but few really do.Of those who would say they “know” me many would be surprised to know that I am new to feeling love. Now, I have known affection, but to say that I could feel love, no. I didn’t even know I had this gap before I started using the essential oils. I thank the Father for His gifts that He has provided in the plants and trees that make these oils up.
I won’t go on about my upbringing, but know that this is a generational curse. It can be tracked into the depths of my roots, this lack of feeling. I am recognizing it and am changing it for my children and their children.
The first mention of generational curses is found in your Scriptures Exodus 20:5 – You shalt not bow down yourself to them, nor serve them: for I Yahweh your El am a jealous El, visiting the sins of the fathers on the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;
I started using Lavender, lemon, frankincense, Ylang Ylang and Passion, peppermint and rosemary. I was in a full on emotional crisis, but continued to use the oils. Bam!! The wall of reality was reached and the Father started revealing to me areas of myself that I wasn’t aware even existed. I wasn’t giving myself permission to feel anything like hurt, sadness, pain, joy or love. I would express anger instead of sadness, because sadness meant you let someone hurt you. These injuries were there, but I wouldn’t see them. Hurts that I never healed from, traumas that I survived that I never addressed at all. I found wounds that my mother had made upon me that were hers to repair. Issues with the relationship between my biological family and I were well known, but that this issue had made any kind of impact to my present life was a new idea to me. Forgiveness is required of me and for me in order for me to truly be open to my Heavenly Father.
In the last few months I have actively taken part in private conversations with my mother. She and I are now working together to repair the damages that we have inflicted on each other. There is no forgiveness given if you are unable to show forgiveness to another.
As for the relationship I have with my own kids, that too has been under heavy repair work. I was under this false blanket of comfort, that I wasn’t turning into my mother and repeating the same “sins”, but I was even more so. I cried to my children and begged them for their forgiveness. Their reactions have been mixed and that was something I had expected. I would love to say that from day 1 there has been 100% improvements, but as with everything in life, this will take time to cure and become the new norm. I am quicker to ask for their forgiveness and to explain my true feelings. I question them about their deep feelings and allow them the room to express them openly. My oldest is having the hardest time with the changes, but I know with prayer this too will be healed.
Father, I come to you in humble prayer, that Your will for my life be done. I lift up my husband to you. Make him a strong man in Your Word, so that he does not bend when pressure is high. Make him the father to his children that You have called him to be. Have his lips only bring esteem to Your name and praises to Your ears. I lift my children to You oh merciful El. Please heal their heartstrings. Ties those strings to my heart and to their father’s heart. Make our family like the walls of Jerusalem, built to last. In Your Son’s name I pray. Amein
I have slowed down on using the peppermint oil, it numbs you emotionally.
If you would like to purchase any of these oils,
or would like to buy a book to help you understand how to use oils,
Look for Modern Essentials